The Onion -- a satirical news source -- wrote up its own article on Mike Brown's firing. WARNING: Language that is possibly offensive (I wouldn't post it on this blog) is used. And keep in mind that The Onion is not real -- just really funny.


--Cheryl Sadler
CSadler@News-Herald.com

Cavs fans, we’re in the early stages of what should be a lengthy playoff run, so it probably isn’t good form to speculate on the future of one LeBron James.

That’s not what I’m going to do. No plea for him to stay and no chest-thumping proclamation that the Chosen One will definitely remain in Northeast Ohio.

But you better believe I’m going to admonish, mock and ridicule those from other locations who have no problems publicly pining for and daydreaming about the day when James comes to their town.

However, New York, whose Knicks have sold their fanbase on a losing culture solely to clear cap space for a mere chance at signing LeBron, has become far too easy a target. Same goes for their soon-to-be neighbors, the New Jersey Nets, who boast some young talent and the MVP’s friend, Jay-Z, to compliment a horrendous 12-70 campaign this season.

Instead, I need to look no further than the Cavs current opponent, the Chicago Bulls. Not because their center Joakim Noah dissed the hometown, but because a major Chicago publication recently issued this love letter of an attempt to acquire the King’s services, as the Bulls also have some cap space to play with this summer. Is an eight seed so bad that Chicagoans need to focus this much on the future?

I’m sure Noah, Derrick Rose and the guys love all this gushing over their playoff nemesis, too.

Pitching the James Hotel to LeBron? Playing up the Michael Jordan statue or the chance to reside near President Barack Obama’s neighborhood? Using MacArthurs fried freakin’ chicken to entice him?? This is pure comedy.

Now, I’m sure people in the ‘Go are saying the same thing about the billboards around these parts or even our own, “Don’t Let LeBron Leave” campaign. Fair enough, but a lot of that is rooted in the hometown angle and the fact that he currently plays here.

We all know James is eating this attention up, and who knows, maybe he will follow in MJ’s steps and don the red and black. If he doesn’t? This will simply be remembered as one of several silly attempts at luring the face of the NBA out of C-town.

-- Brandon C. Baker

Photo: Maribeth Joeright

You’ve heard all along about the “Summer of LeBron” commencing next July. But, really, that might be a more appropriate title for the here and now.

That’s because right now we have no clue what the NBA’s Most Valuable Player plans to do once his contract ends next summer.

Read more here

- Brandon C. Baker

With his Cavaliers teammates behind him, LeBron James accepts the NBA Most Valuable Player award Monday during a ceremony at James' alma mater, Akron St. Vincent-St. Mary High School, in Akron. (AP Photo/Amy Sancetta)

What a way to start the week of the Eastern Conference semifinals!

I was never a basketball fan until I started working with Cavalier fans in 2006. It has only magnified since I moved to Northeast Ohio two years ago. I'm still not a diehard fan (sometimes I get bored during games and would rather be playing with Mark Meszoros' iPhone) like some people I know (I'm talking about you, Nick Carrabine), but I have never loved watching basketball as much as I have loved watching the Cavs this season.

Reading Bob Finann's article for the front page of Tuesday's paper only further illustrated why I enjoy LeBron and the rest of the team so much. They are classy and humble -- not to mention talented. If you haven't caught the Cavs fever yet, now would be a good time to start. The Eastern Conference semifinals game against the Hawks tips off at 8 tonight.

-- Cheryl Sadler
CSadler@News-Herald.com

Did you ever imagine this moment?

Don’t lie to me.

You likely knew we’d be good, but this was just ridiculous. I think 66-16 exceeded expectations just a bit.

But now is the time the Cavs can prove their worth. That they really deserved to dominate SportsCenter and local media alike for much of this season. That “King James” is really king of this league.

We’ve heard it time and time again that anything less than a championship will be a disappointment. I hadn’t really bought that argument until the team recently clinched homecourt throughout the playoffs. Now Celtic forward Kevin Garnett’s health is in question, and Orlando’s Hedo Turkoglu might not be a 100 percent for these playoffs.

You might never got more of a sweetheart deal than that.

So, it starts with the Detroit Pistons, a familiar foe. A surprising 8 seed, they’re not exactly the powerhouse of the early ‘00s. Still, they’ve been around the block with proven big men Rasheed Wallace and Antonio McDyess and Rip Hamilton, the best in the NBA coming off screens.

Budding guards Rodney Stuckey and Will Bynum aren’t bad either ...

OK, I give up.

Cleveland, WE ARE GOING TO SMOKE THIS TEAM.

Nothing more to it. Their coach is a deer in headlights. Wallace will be more interested in technical fouls than rebounding and helping on LBJ.

I wholeheartedly expect a four-game sweep. Then, I expect to obnoxiously mock all of my friends from that area for at least the next full calendar year.

Should some shocking turn of events occur, I’ll rely on my man Rich-Rod to help me humiliate the state up north. That will surely work.

--Brandon C. Baker
Photo: The Associated Press

Killing a pedestrian with your car while possibly intoxicated? Sending explicit text messages to a fan during a game?

How about signing also-rans like Hank Poteat?

If you’re looking for more reasons to turn this Browns Town into a Cavs Metropolis, the folks in Berea will never let you down.

Meanwhile, the Cavaliers are sporting the best record in basketball. They’re clicking on all cylinders and have a very realistic chance at bringing a trophy and respect back to Northeast Ohio.

But silly me. Of course it’s more fun to call talk radio shows and debate about which 50 percent passer should be our starting quarterback.

It might be hard to tell at this point, but I am a Cleveland Browns fan. However, I’m also a realist. The team has done nothing to remain in at the forefront of our athletic conscious.

Many of the players’ behavior on and off the field has embarrassed us all and caused our friends from other NFL cities to disparage us until we begged for mercy. What’s more, the new general manager/head coach tandem barely speaks to us through any medium. So why, then, do we continue talk about which then next draft pick they’ll likely screw up in Browns fashion?

Another cornerstone of Browns fashion is venting and complaining. That’s exactly what I’m doing here, nothing more. I won’t be withdrawing my fan card anytime soon and I won’t ask you to, either.

What I will ask, though, is that if you’re going to show up downtown to tailgate at odd hours of the day, how about doing it for the team that actually wins?

It’s true, there’s nothing like football, but there’s also nothing like LeBron James. Remember that, in the coming months when he and his teammates make a deep playoff run, but still find themselves sharing ink and airtime with a team that would shock the world by winning half of its games in 2009.

You know it will happen.

-- Brandon C. Baker

--Photos: Getty Images and The Associated Press

Last week’s games kept us on the edge or our seats and drowsy each morning after.

If we didn’t know this season was a special one, we found out during that West Coast trip, chock full of games the Cleveland Cavaliers surely would’ve blown last year. They’re 53-13, and surprisingly starting to look back at the Boston Celtics. But now is certainly not the time to get comfortable.

Sure they swept the triumvirate of the L.A. Clippers, Phoenix and Sacramento, but they did so with habits that won’t get the job done this week. The Cavs are prepping themselves for a DEEP (and hopefully “In Da Q”) playoff run, and their upcoming opponents give them a great opportunity to see what they’re working with.

Orlando visits tomorrow, with dominant big man Dwight Howard and a stable of three-point shooters in tow. The Magic’s much-improved point guard Jameer Nelson suffered a season-ending shoulder injury earlier this year, but the team has replaced him with Rafer Alston, a competent point who can make shots and lead a team. The Cavs need to bring their primetime defense to this matchup of beasts in the East.

Sure that sounds like an obvious statement for this game, and really any other. But it needs mentioning, since the Cavs played nothing that resembled D, interior or perimeter, during their Westside swing. They turned it on late in two of the three games, and really relied on monster performances by LeBron James and Mo Williams to outscore the opposition.

The Portland Trailblazers, who come to town on Thursday, won’t stand for that simply because they’re a much more balanced team than the those three Western Conference counterparts or the New York Knicks, who the Cavaliers edged last night. On Saturday, Cleveland takes on the Atlanta Hawks, the fourth-place team that is more than capable of winning a big one (see the Cavs’ loss to them in December for evidence).

All of this is concerning since Cleveland hasn’t fared well against top-tier teams for most of this season. However, in the REAL ‘Season of Dreams,’ Cleveland seems to get “it.” You could see it on James’ face after each win last week — he wasn’t satisfied with a W. Instead he wanted to figure out how to stop smallish guards from waltzing in the lane. He also wanted rookies like Sacramento’s Jason Thompson to stop getting easy slams.

Cleveland should be alright. Just think, at this time last year the team was adjusting to a new roster and attempting to put it all together for the stretch run. This time, the guys know each other and work well with one another, and that will only help in the coming months.

This week will be fun, for sure. We’ll all ‘witness it,’ and without having to stay up until 1 a.m., too.

-- Brandon C. Baker
Photo: The Associated Press